Frustration

Sometimes I just want to kick certain people.

Dan, my ex husband, called me today to tell me he was sending me $200.00 (out of the $1400.00 he owes me). He proceeds to go on and on about how he misses me every day and how he misses my widow's peak and whatever other body part he happens to throw in that day. Told me he loves me. How the hell does he expect me to react? I don't give a damn that he dreams of me or that he can't get over me. I mean he couldn't say anything nice when we were together. All I got then was awful, evil shit I can't even repeat it hurts so bad. Obsession over body parts just makes me feel like the sex object he kept wanting me to be. He was too lame to realize that words and actions really affected my perception and desire of him.

All I could say was, "Dan it's been two years". I have no other reaction to him when he says these things. Apparently he tried to date but can't...talks about me all the time. *sigh* He knows I've moved on and am quite happy, at least I've told him that. Whether or not it computes is another thing.

What really pissed me off was the fact he mentioned a son of some friends of his (former friends of mine). He said how the kid was so great and how wonderful it was to play with him and be with him, hold him...how he'd like to have a kid. I could vomit...really. I told him I never wanted to hear those words come out of his mouth. HOW DARE HE??? Besides the alcohol consumption, the children issue was the largest problem. He knew I wanted a baby so bad and yet changed his mind on me saying no. To hear him say that kind of shit makes me livid.

I also found out he's good friends with some older woman who's a new teacher at the school I'm going to teach at. She knows all about me. I don't even have to explain why that's irritating. She better not EVER talk to me about him.

It just upsets me how no matter how happy and stable I am with Alex, Dan still can piss me off to no end and remind me of how we were a failure. I never expected to get divorced. When I got married it was for good and it still hurts that it has gone down like it did. And he telling me all this crap, how the hell am I supposed to react? Am I supposed to run back to him or something? It's no going to happen...it's too late.