Children are a Work of ART

At least if I'm to have any, mine most likely will be, and by ART I mean Assisted Reproductive Technology.

I had my endometrial biopsy on Friday, since I had another failed cycle, and had arranged to take the rest of the afternoon off from work. I'm so glad I did because not only did it hurt like a bitch but I spent a good hour crying in the car with my mom.

I received some news that was something I didn't expect to hear. I expected that I would be the one with problems (I still may, I haven't gotten my biopsy results back yet) but it turned out it was Alex. His first SA was so bad they couldn't even complete all the tests.

It looks like he will be diagnosed with Severe MFI. According to my specialist, that means our only hope for a baby will be IVF with ICSI.

What? A test tube baby? Why God, why? I have never had anything easy in my life, never, and that news just felt like a slap in the face. I tried to hold it together in the office and ended up losing it in the car.

So now what? Alex has another SA on Tuesday and I'm praying that it be better, just 30% better so we could have the option of IUI. I don't know how we'll be able to afford IVF. I don't have $10,000+ lying around. We don't have credit and my insurance doesn't cover any infertility (a big FUCK YOU to the Catholic Church and their idea that IVF and other fertility treatments are degrading).

I am so, so sad. We need prayers right now, Alex for Tuesday (we don't have to tell Alex we are praying for him) and me for the strength to deal with it all. I'll take good, healing vibes too.