6/17/10

New Meanings, New Beginnings


This Sunday is Father's Day which historically is a day in which I'd rather gargle turpentine than celebrate. I believe I started calling it Non-existent Father's Day in my teens and oft wished they had Hallmark cards celebrating it or cards you could give to moms for being both mom and dad. Who knows, they probably have them now.

See, my dad was an abusive asshole, probably still is considering that he's still alive as far as I know. That day was never a time to celebrate and its arrival would always make me cry many daddy-less tears, second only to watching the father and daughter dance at a wedding (I have to leave the room for those).

However, now I can put that behind me. I can start anew with the afore dreaded Father's Day. Father's Day has new meaning for me this year.

I only have to look at my husband playing with Sebastian or hear him tell him he loves him to have that sadness wiped away. I can celebrate what my son has and what he and my husband have given me rather than what I don't have and for that I am so grateful.

I may get irritated at my husband sometimes and wish he helped me more, I may get pissed off at the whole me/him/step-daughter triangle, but he is first and foremost a great dad and boy does he love his kids.

Thank you Alex for what you have given me and for how much you love our baby. I love you and Happy Father's Day!

2 comments:

Elizabeth said...

that is such a sweet picture! I am so sorry about your dad. Thankfully Sebastian will have a much different childhood than you - all thanks to your wonderful choice in husbands! :)

Rose said...

I love that little romper-is it Carters?